Parenting with intention is showing determination to match your goals with your actions. In the first step, you wrote a list of expectations that you have for your child and considered why it was important. Now you can start to prioritize.

Parenting can appear overwhelming. As you review your list it may appear that your goals are unachievable. We are going to take this one step at a time. At the end of this process, you will have a clear understanding of your needs and wants and how to realize them.

Step two is a review and clean up. Take your brainstorming notes and divide them into three areas. The first category is for tasks or expectations that are already being met on a daily basis,  a good place to start. When we begin to look at rewarding positive behavior these will serve you well in celebrating strengths in your child’s behavior.

The second category is for tasks that have been achieved at times but still have room for improvement. When a child needs reminders to complete a task such as brushing their teeth or putting on their shoes then it should go in this category.

Finally, the third category is reserved for tasks that are a constant effort. Many of these goals appear unachievable because your child has learned how to get around them. We will take these goals and address them a few at a time.

This is an opportunity for you to share your list with your child.  They will have some good ideas as to what you ask of them.  Add more expectations to the list as they arise. Part of reviewing notes is understanding where you have holes.

Step 1 and 2 of Parenting with Intention should be repeated continuously as you go through this process. 

Vlinder provides a list of expectations and explanations on Task Sheets. Learn more about it at